The ring bearer, sometimes called a Pageboy, is still a very traditional part of the bridal entourage. He is the male complement to the little flower girl and is usually between the ages of about three and eight years. Many couples choose a relative (on either his or her side) to fulfil this role. However, [...]

The ring bearer, sometimes called a Pageboy, is still a very traditional part of the bridal entourage. He is the male complement to the little flower girl and is usually between the ages of about three and eight years. Many couples choose a relative (on either his or her side) to fulfil this role. However, you could also choose the son of a friend, if there are no relatives to be your ring bearer.

The main role of the ring bearer is, as his title indicates, to carry the wedding rings down the aisle. Because the ring bearer is usually so young, many couples prefer to attach pseudo wedding rings to his pillow instead of the real thing. This is a precautionary measure, in case he becomes attached to the rings and does not want to part with them at the moment in which the ring exchange arises. You do not want to have to stop proceedings to reason with the young child. It also means that he gets to keep his props, which will likely make him rather pleased.

The ring bearer will also need to walk down the aisle before the bride enters the venue of the ceremony. He can either do this on his own (before the flower girl and the bridesmaids enter), or he can be escorted down by someone in the entourage. If you are confident that he and the flower girl are old enough not to be intimidated or confused, they can also walk down the aisle alone together. When both the flower girl and ring bearer reach the end of the aisle, they may either stand with the bride and groom at the front, or be seated with the family in the front row. Remember that standing for long periods is likely to make them tired, bored and more prone to mischief.

You would definitely include the little ring bearer in some of your formal wedding photographs. Keep in mind that your wedding day can become very long and even a little boring for young children. Try to organise that the photographs with the children are taken as early on in the process as possible and then let them go ahead to the reception venue. Request that their parent(s) or another adult come with you and then take care of the children through the ceremony, photographs and reception. This person should keep them occupied, give them snacks or refreshments when necessary and take them to the loo.

In terms of attire, your ring bearer can wear a small tuxedo or suit to match the groom and groomsmen. This can look really cute. Otherwise, make him feel a little more comfortable in a smart, but comfortable set of shorts or cargo pants, worn with an open-necked shirt (long- or short-sleeved). It is, generally speaking, the responsibility of the ring bearer’s parents to pay for his outfit, so you might simply ask them to dress him in his own smart clothes, depending on the style and theme of your wedding.

The ring bearer will usually sit with his family at the wedding reception, not at the formal bridal table, as will the flower girl. During the festivities of the reception, he should be encouraged to dance with the flower girl at least once, particularly for sweet photo opportunities.

To thank your ring bearer, buy him something that is age-appropriate. Consider vouchers for popular toy stores, tickets to an amusement park or a set of books or DVD’s that you know he will love.